There will follow photos, which probably have no bearing on the textual content of this post.
I just felt I wanted to post the pics, to lighten the mood,
or not so to speak.
Long ago, in another life, we lost some friends we had held dear.
I never really understood the loss of these friends, & could not work out the reason for the ensuing, seeming, hostility.
We had been friends with this couple for about 6 years. We had attended the divorce party, of the male, from his first disastrous marriage.
Gom was Best Man at the Civil Ceremony of their marriage. An occasion in which the Bride's father came to visit the City for the first time in 25 years!
Quite a feat, considering they lived not more than 10 miles from said City.
In the meantime we had witnessed the discovery, the awful journey of treatment, & subsequent death from cancer, Leukemia, of the younger sister of the Bride. A child of 11, whose life was too short, & too tragic to bear, for all concerned.
We had supported the couple in their grief, & supported them in their beginning marriage. We had cried with them, & rejoiced with them in triumphs of business, & property aquisitions. He acquired a business, & became Managing Director. A well respected business in the City. She acquired a more prominent position in her Accounting firm. All looked rosy & happy.
We spent many happy comfortable hours in their company. They lived on a farm, which was owned by the Bride's -single- brother. A lovely old homestead. We kept & maintained Pigs, on the property with our friends. We took turns to Market the Weeners. Bride + HYPH, Meggie + Groom. We boasted about better prices at the Market. We (I) helped with the neutering of the male piglets. I have blogged of this previously here.
As you can see, a lot of shared history & good times.
Then came a time, we bought our Country Hotel.
Our lovely friends came to visit often, & worked the bars (with pay) when we were busy, & stayed the weekends with us. Good friends indeed.
When Gom & I decided we would make the Big Move, & sell our Hotel, & come to Oz to live, we began negotiations very quietly, as was the way of Hotels, back in the day. We had an eager buyer, & it was all very hush-hush on all sides. A private sale negotiated in quietness & almost secrecy.
I wanted to tell close friends.Gom insisted we not tell anyone of our intention. I felt he was a little superstitious, but my loyalties lay with him.
I think later, after we had sold, & were awaiting a legal glitch to leave the country, our friends felt betrayed, that we had not told them of our intent. I feel it caused the rift, which was never healed, between our friendship. They were invited to our farewell party. The reluctantly attended late, & sour of disposition. It broke my heart, but I felt I had had to keep the faith of my loyalty to Gom.
I have wondered about it all, often, over the ensuing years. Was my loyalty also a betrayal?
I suspect my friends thought so, although I dont know that the husband viewed it as betrayal. On our visits back there, he was more than cordial...not so the wife.
On his visits over here, he contacted us, & seemed happy enough to see us, but we never saw his wife, & never saw her on an subsequent visits to that Southern City.
I tend to be a 'Loyal' person, who has friends from beginning school days. Gom on the other hand tends to shed friends along his way. He does however have long term friends he has had from school days. His Best Man from his first marriage is one he still regards as a friend.
Loyalty is a curious beast!
Look! How gorgeous is this little fellow!! My beloved cousin's Grandson.
Do you think he might be a Gingernut??
Hey look Mum, I am swimming!!
And this, just steals my heart! How touching, & it makes me want to cry, but I can't.
Enya Carribean Blue