Oftentimes, the Odds are very funny, as in heartbreaking humorous.
They need to be, because if I wasn't laughing, I would be crying.
We have had SG for a few hours here & there.
In spite of a somewhat strung-out, tense, Nanna, he sees the Bright Side.
This is his painting.
A Rainbow, SG on the left, & a bright large Nanna on the right.
There is Sun, a Pool, and Blue Skies.
He is so glad School is back tomorrow!
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Just innocently shopping for groceries at our local mongrel minded Supermarket.
They have Freezer Cabinets, which require doors being opened and the packaged food chosen, can be removed from the shelves, by the customer.
Some of the packages are above eye level. This involves reaching up, to get the package.
When one selects a package, one does not expect to recieve sharp boxes or other, heavy frozen packages, to come cascading out, onto one's Breast!
Nor does one expect to recieve large bruises to one's breast, in the innocent pursuit of frozen grocery items.
At risk of offering TMI, I show you evidence of the said package bruises, to my left breast.
How is one supposed to offer proof of such a bruising experience?
I can hardly be expected to race into the shop, and flap out a bruised breast for examination, surely?
Or perhaps I could. I might also be arrested for indecent exposure. Or offensive behaviour.
I thought about taking the photographic evidence to the manager. However, I reconsidered this option. I had no desire to make a "Clean, (if Bruised,) Breast of it" so to speak.
I have had occasion to be taken out to the "Staff Room" to 'wash my hands', which were contaminated by maggots from tins of punctured dog food, which had escaped the notice of shelf stockers. (I did have the brief thought they may have been the puncturers of said tins.)
Apart from the fact that the Staff Room had no running water, with which to wash hands, nor any decent cleaning equipment/cloths, (stock was grabbed hastily from the shop shelf, to offer me something clean to remove the maggots) I also noticed the general filth of the room, plus the prominent "Staff Notice Board". I have no desire to have my Bruised Breast displayed for ridicule, and perhaps defacement, upon this Notice Board.
I also realise that cropping renders the said Bruise photographs almost useless, as there is no recognizable feature to prove what one is supposed to be viewing.
A dilemma with no answer. I will just have to let it go, and remember never to stand too close to those dangerous freezer cabinets.
I begin to wonder if I somehow attract such disasters, as I was once struck upon the head by several bolts of fabric, in a Quilt Shop. The bolts had been stacked on top of high shelves, which were free-standing. It was a very unpleasant, and unnerving experience. I was not offered any more than a cursory apology, with the implication it was my own fault for standing in the spot where the bolts landed! Goodness knows what caused the fall, I had certainly not even touched the shelves.
Perhaps it was my turn to be slammed on the head!! In the CCTPPO (Cosmic Conspiracy To Piss People Off,) you understand.
I admit to being a lousy Housekeeper. I hate housework with a passion which is better directed to sewing or nursing.
I was treated to a much needed bout of nigh on hysterical mirth, when I discovered that huge bags of leftover Christmas wrappings and trappings have been travelling around in the back seat of a certain person's beloved car. This car has been in for various 'fixings'. It has been to several different work shops for these various 'fixings'.
No one had made any comments. Well, not to the owner's face, anyway. Who knows what was said, in the privacy etc.
However the driver did notice that other motorists, initially drawn to admire this beloved car, it being very unusual, often looked again, with disbelief at the back seat contents, so happily lying scattered, spilling out of the bags supposed to contain said Seasonally Merry trappings and papers.
It somehow appealed to my sense of the ridiculous, that these items have been travelling about bringing yet more seasonal joy to passersby.
In other ludicrous news, GOM's cough persists. More blood drawings show other problems are improved, to a degree I wont repeat, according to the Doctor. However, he is still not feeling very bright and gets very tired.
The weather is very strange. Low grey skies, high humidity. Cheerless.
Reading is the best option, when I can concentrate.
I just don't know where to begin, after the most recent post.
Mr & Mrs NN, have had the worst possible diagnosis. The tumour was removed, with success. It was not benign. So begins a long journey for our very good friends. ( Shocking 'bullet holes' in our world!)
They remain in our hearts every day, with love and caring, of affection deeply felt.
We have had some very black comedy, in our quest for Health and Wellness.
Yesterday, I took a very ill GOM to the local Medical Center. Our usual Doctor was Interstate for the week.
GOM had continued to deteriorate, in spite of antibiotic treatment.
We logged in, for an appointment with 'first available Doctor'. We were told the wait would be an hour, so we decided to sit and wait. GOM had forgotten his hearing aids, but I had thought I might have time to go home to get them. On being told it was an hour, we decided it was not worth a trip home. As they say, 'famous last thoughts!!' "They" lied, of course, and it was over 2 hours before we got attention.
We sat and waited. We observed a Doctor-person arrive, & begin to take patients. I have seen this Doctor before, whilst waitiing with my Grandaughter. He has been dubbed 'The Old F***er' by some of the regulars. We had no knowledge of this Doctor, nor his history. We have, however concluded, on past sightings, that he appears to be in need of the mortuary trolley or an ambulance to cart him off. He appears to be a very ill man. Bent double, and unable to call for his patients.. The receptionist calls out the name of the latest patient.
Yes you guessed it, we got allocated to the OF.
It was like some ghastly black comedy, or tragie/comedy. As we are greeted, silently, by the OF, I produce the medications sheet provided by our regular GP. I explain in almost shouting terms, the problem with GOM's chest and the fact he is about to be out of Antibiotics. The whispering GP finally tells me has Parkinson's Disease, so he cannot talk above a whisper, (which is often unheard by me.) I am shouting, explaining that GOM is deaf, so therefore unable to hear Dr Whispering P. I have to be the interpreter, as it were.
Dr W P listens to GOMs chest. He tells us GOMs chest is 'in a bad way'. Not comfortng news, but exactly what I had suspected. He then takes 20 minutes on his compter to give us a couple of prescriptions for medications. A stronger inhaler medication, plus a repeat of the Antibiotics. With differing instructions on how to take them. Not comforting, but not to be questioned.
I feel like I am dancing in some macabre comedy when I am trying to tell GOM what is happening, & trying to explain to the ever-smiling Dr OF , that we get it, and thankyou very much for your attention. I did wonder if the rosey cheeks & the perpetual smile were part of the Parkinson's. A very sad, but somehow hideously comedic Doctor visit!
GOM continues to be gravely ill. I am the primary carer & the nurse. I dont mind if he spends all day in bed. I try to give him nice meals with variety.
I still remain the most pitiful house wife in the area. I loathe housework, and I suppose I always will.
I took our Leo to be clipped yesetrday.
I bear the scars today.
There was blood all over the floor- it was mine! Leo decided he did not want his paws clipped, nor his nails trimmed.
So the Groomer, & I had a hot sweaty, bloody, hour getting him to play 'ball' one might say. Today, I have lost skin, -hence the blood on the floor- bruises you would not believe, to both forearms, plus thighs, as we sat on the floor tying to get cooperation over trimming those last 2 feet!!
He was so good today, when we had an unexpected visitor, who barked LOUDLY at Leo. We got Leo on the lead, & he was very good. Our visitor was a Golden, who is normally so placid, but he gets excited on seeing 'toys'!!
All is calm now. The day has been hot beyond belief. I wanted to float away on Cloudboats.
I have thought of many posts over the past few days.
Some, I have mentally filed away, for future thought, and consideration.
Some, I have discarded as boring beyond belief or endurance. ( Of course, I realise this post may indeed fall into this category to many readers!)
In my lonely hours as a nurse, I have resorted to mindless mindless being the foremost description,Televisual distractions.
This is where the title of this post originates.
I have noticed there is a distinct "Profile" one has to fill, if one wishes to be a FEMALE Television Presenter, News Reader or Weather Girl.
Flicking about the various channels, I have had the opportunity to observe the fact that MALES can be almost any shape, age, fit, unfit, dishevelled, grey, pasty, wrinkled, wart-or-mole-laden, and they will not be denied employment. They may also have facial hair, though most do not.
Hair, of lack of it does not seem to matter. Nor does colour, of the hair, or lack of it, style, and even some atrocious dye jobs, and wigs are quite acceptable... for MALES.
However...
Woe betide the hapless female who does not fit the "Profile".
It seems the preferred image this season is the Afghan Hound look. Blond is preferrable- never mind about the black or dark roots, they are optional.
Also, never mind if the 'Personality' has crossed eyes or one slightly off-centre-eye-cast. the hair is the THING!! Houndlike features are optional also, but wrinkles or sagging, or visible signs of age, are all OUT!
For the Female Presenters, that is. (Some oldish, prune-like Males seem to be immune from any type of discrimmination, regardless of how unpleasant their visage may be, to the televisual viewer.
It is most important that the hair be tamed to within an inch of it's life, with a strict adherence to the 'Afghan' look.
Of course a little backcombing is occasionally permissable.
Dark hair will even be accepted, as long as the overall effect is still Afghan.
Try any Channel, I am sure you notice what I mean. Of course, I am talking Oz TV here.
What ever happened to "Variety is the Spice of Life"?
ARRRGH!
More ARRRGH with my ISP. My service keeps dropping out, with no apparent reason?? WTH!
Just a few curiosities, I have been thinking about.
I suspect bad news, in any form, really makes you stop, and take stock.
For some time now, GOM has suffered from depression. A depression which he would not admit to, so he refused to consult anyone about having it treated. It affected me deeply, and living with it was difficult.
Since I struggle with periods of depression, they began to blob into one continuous condition.
It seems that now, since staring the very real possibility of imminent death in the face, Gom has had a change of heart. It is almost as if he has decided he wants to live longer, and refuses to believe he may not.
Which is a very good outcome, even if it had to come at such a high cost. We had another heartening visit to the Doctor yesterday, and he told us, that although there is a long road ahead, there is a pleasing response to the drugs. I know he feared there was cancer, which was not evident in the scans. The latest blood tests show no sign of any cancer, so that is very good news.
Once again, thankyou for all your support & wonderful thoughts wishes and kindness. I am sure it all helps.
On another sad note, Mr & Mrs NN (Nice Neighbours) have had some very devastating news. Mr NN is very ill, and is being operated on today, for removal of a brain tumour.
We are keeping them both in our hearts and hoping for a positive outcome. Mr NN is the same age as I am, so he has a lot of living left to do!
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Onto other curiosities.
I have been thinking of days past, friends we no longer see, but still keep in touch with, and relatives we hold dear.
Childhood phrases spring to mind, with curious sayings that are never heard today.
Only the more mature (haha) among you, may remember these.
"Excuse me, Mrs Pillharding, it is snowing down South!" This indicated a show of petticoat -remember those??- beneath the hem of a dress or skirt. It seems hilarious in this day and age, when quite often sheer clothes reveal the knickers or lack of beneath, and petticoats are unheard of! Or, alternatively petticoats are worn as outer garments.
"So what if my shoes are old fashioned? They are clean and well paid for!" Often, if one's shoes squeaked it was said they were not paid for.
"Little pitchers have big ears!" Referring of course to small children's listening ears. Or possibly nosey neighbours.
"I hear that June Flashbottom is pregnant. I always knew she was no better than she should be!"
(I never did really understand this one? who decreed how 'better she should be?' than whom, or what needed she to be better than, or not better than?) I suppose it was a reference to 'class' or 'breeding'- especially if June Flashbottom had been "Putting on Airs" or "Above her Station" which are other old terms. These days it would be referred to as being "Up herself" I suppose. Which is a bit silly, since that could not be the reason she is pregnant....
"Of course Gloria Pullknight is putting on weight, she is up the duff!" Or "Nola Slatter has a bun in the oven" Further terms for (usually an umarried) pregnant girls.
"Excuse me Mrs Arden, the pigs are in your garden!" This was a childhood saying when one burped!
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Yet more curiosities...
I should write a book on How Not to Garden!
All the money I spent on containers, best potting mix, countless plants, fertiliser etc etc, could have provided us handsomely with fruit and vegetables for one month approximately!
The only things that I had limited success with, are some herbs, and the lettuces, which we did eat and enjoy.
I was told that I was mistaken thinking cardboard boxes would be ecologically sound to use for planting. Bugs love carboard, as it provides an excellent nursery for their growth, along with hand roots and leaves to eat.
I was also told that tomatoes hate lettuce, so planting them together was a mistake.
The white butterflies love my garden attempts. They have feasted royally and well. I caught a fat caterpillar eating one of my Topsy Turvy Tomatoes. I squashed it, which I normally never do!
I had a nice ripe tomato, ready to pick. It was large, about the size of my fist. Imagine my dismay when I found it gone! Who knows what secret predator took it? I wonder if lizards eat tomatoes? Perhaps it was a sneaky rodent? Or a secret Possum? I have no idea, but I hope it choked them!!
In other curiousities, I find I am unable to concentrate to read, or sew or even watch much TV. I suppose the reason is called worry. Try as I will, my mind will not stay away from 'Reasons'.
We did watch and really enjoy a Movie called The Blind Side. If you have to beg borrow or steal it, make sure you see it!! It is wonderful. What makes it even better, is that it is a true story!
We also saw The Lovely Bones. I was disappointed in the casting. I nit pick about things like 2 dark brown eyed parents having a light grey eyed child. I hate it when the Movie is different to the book. Which is not to say I did not enjoy the Movie, it was just 'different' to what I expected.
Another engrossing Movie, which was harrowing, but excellent, is Brothers. Distractions I found could stop the 'Reasons' intruding for short periods of time.
Without going into too many details, I just wanted to post a short update, as so many of you have been so kind, and generous in your thoughts, comments & kind wishes to both me and GOM.
He had several problems, (not to do with his eyesight, but as well as the eyesight).
Problems which he has had for some time, though they suddenly seemed to accelerate in odd ways.
Our Doctor sent him for blood tests, and at the last minute decided to send him for CT Scans also.
The Scan results shocked everyone including the Doctor, who fitted us into his hectic schedule on Friday for more or less urgent consultation. The scan results were backed up by the blood tests, so there was no error.
The Doctor talked to us, telling us the truth, telling us also, that it is not necessarily as grim as it seems. He has put Gom on some strong medications, and is hopeful he can avoid a hospital term, but told us to be aware it may be unavoidable. A positive outcome is by no means guaranteed, but he cheered us with his positive attitude, and information that treatments are available. He is a very straight talking man, and calls a spade a spade!
Gom also has a very unpleasant hacking cough, which is unrelated to the other problems, but as you may imagine, it is very wearing for both of us to live with.
Gom was considerably cheered after seeing the Doctor. However he does tire very quickly & needs plenty of rest. He still has his sense of humour, and when I refused to let him peg up the washing, asked me "Why?"
I replied "I hate the way you peg it up", so he laughed, & told me it has taken me a damn long time to tell him!
After his breakfast in bed, he told me he is relishing the TLC!
He won't be missing any pills either, because now the Pill Nazi has taken over the doling out of same!!
One good aspect- I get to drive the car!!
This song was a favourite when we were younger and a lot less Grey!
Knowing that you have just eaten a small slice of said tomato, of course!
Finding that the same small wasps seem to have deposited eggs in ALL the lemons on the tree?
Having not bought lemons, for your drinks and your cooking, because you knew you had some on the tree!
Seeing, often, tripping about the local Supermarket, the Dapper, Trim, Immaculately dressed, Small but perfectly formed Surgeon, who supposedly performed your ‘urgent’ surgery after a whole year’s delay? The year’s wait for this extensive repair, caused fourfold the damage initially done, therefore causing the surgery to become far more extensive to repair.
Having to resist rushing up to this man, grabbing my offensive deformity, and shaking it at him, and asking him is he proud of “his” handiwork? I could one day snap and resort to actual Assault. However I am sure it was the students who did the work of surgical ‘wonder’, and it was only in his name. Little wonder he no longer does ‘Public Surgery’. I sure hope he makes a better job for his private patients.
Having your GOM going blind, by degrees, and admitting he is now not seeing colours?
Why, having him INSIST on driving when I can, and do have a license! I admit I am not a very confident driver, & tend to use caution, but I can still see perfectly well, colours included, and I do know how to drive!
Having a very unwell GOM?
Having a very unwell GOM who flatly refuses to go to a Medical Centre, because our own Docs are on holiday! (Well deserved holiday I might add, having had some devastating conditions themselves.)
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Because I realise I need to balance some of the horrible things in the first half of this post
What could be better than….
Suddenly feeling the urge to do some sewing?
Actually beginning to do some! Which, I confess, because of reasons, I have not yet begun.
Having all your family that is possible, gathered at your Festive Meal Table for the Christmas Feast.
The answer to this is Nothing could be better, except perhaps having absent members present.
Having wonderful friends?
Having wonderful Friends who gave me a replacement Topsy Turvy Tomato!
Having a dear little Small Grandson come to visit?
Having a dear little SG willing to pose with the TT Tomato! Woe betide any wasps!
Being Retired, and able to please yourself if you want to read all day?
Being able to do it all again the next day, if you so choose!
Having several cool days, with gentle rainfall?
Having an efficient Aircon, that can deal with the high humidity!
Having interesting Blog friends to read, all over the Globe?
Having the time to get around them all!!
As I said Elsewhere, “After last year’s bag of dud nuts, there must be something good coming for all of us”! Happy 2010!