Sunday, August 26

You Have Been Warned! Offensive Content.

Who could not love this little face! This is Mr & Mrs Nice Neighbour's little dog. He is such a good little boy.He has always been a lovely dog, but he used to get so excited & would jump & bark whenever we met him. Now he is the model of a well behaved dog. Mr & Mrs NN have been training him with a non force, non food reward, method. It seems to have worked miracles, & they have lent us the video, & we are so far very pleased with the results with our 2 outlaws.


Thinking of training dogs, the following conversation for your information.

"Oh goodness, what is that? Is it a football wearing a very badly dyed old sheepskin? And why are you dragging it along on that lead?"
***
"Your dog?? That is an actual dog? Oh yes, now I see the stumps for legs. And the bared fangs at the er.. front end?"
***
"Can I venture to ask how it got, er, shaped like that?"
***
" Oh I see. You have been training it.
Using the rewards/treats system."
***
"And how is that working out for you? Sh!t! It almost took my finger off!"
***
"Still a long way to go, you think?"
***
"Oh, look out, I think it is weeing on your leg! Oh I see your leg & shoe are very yellow already!"
***
Walks off muttering to self, "Wretched thing will very likely die of obesity long before it gets 'trained'. Owner is well trained though...in the art of giving food when required."


CAUTION!!!
Proceed at you own risk!


This is the part, where I would ask anyone with Religion to look the other way, in case they may be offended with content.

We have been watching with amazement & interest, as the world seems to go periodically mad, at supposed findings of faces of the Christ, or the Mary or other 'religious' faces- though how anyone actually knows what these people or beings, actually look like is beyond us too!

And why dont we hear of Bhuddists finding Bhuddas, (although I do believe they are urged to kill the Bhudda if they see it) or Hindi's finding their supposed Deities? Although I do seem to remember some Elephant statue pouring forth milk... no one mentioned the smell that must have prevailed at that little phenomena site! And do the Muslims have such phenomena too?

I apologise if I am offending anyone. As I dont have a religion or an Icon to stand & worship, I am ignorant as to the names, & terms of most of these matters.

Anway, the point of this, is that we noticed some weeks ago, that there was a mysterious shape appeared out on our concrete in the back yard. We decided to wait & see if a face appeared.

We could see raking in the dosh, as we charged admission to view. And sold tissues for the tears that would be sure to be shed at the sight of such a wondrous thing.

Alas, this seems to be as far as it was going to go.

You would agree, not very impressive or remotely Iconic.
So this morning I thought I should try a little enhancement.
Of course the fact that SG's chalks are mostly broken & eaten by the dog didn't aid the art work in being subtle. And the colours, well... I did what I could with them.
Dismally inadequate, obviously.
I think we will have to make our mint some other way. Unless.. we get some cereal that looks like the christ Oh yes, that has been done. O well back to the drawing board. So to speak.
I know, what about a toasted sandwich??


Cat Stevens, On The Road To Find Out.

24 comments:

Fairlie said...

I'm sure you could chisel out that piece of concrete and list it on ebay!!

Josie said...

I think it looks like Casper the Friendly Ghost! Surely to goodness you could make some money on that :-)

daysgoby said...

Chuckling..

Yes! Snap a picture of that off to e-bay immediately!

Quilting Kim said...

Well, Meggie, it kind of looks like the anti-Christ with those red spooky eyes. Or, maybe Bluebeard The Pirate incarnate. I think you need to buy SG some new chalks (he-he).

Mr & Mrs NN's dog does look rather well behaved, but so does Bailey when the camera is turned on. Personally, I prefer an outlaw dog.

tracey petersen said...

Are you sure it's not Bill Oddie from the Goodies? He has a beard you know.

sheoflittlebrain said...

Oh, meggie, I was feeling down right cranky tonight, but you've given me a good laugh and I'm off to bed in a much better mood. Have you ever considered stand-up comedy?

JUST A MOM said...

I love it,,,, nice to meet you..

Alice said...

I think I should definitely start training myself with the "no force, no food" method - especially the last bit!

anne bebbington said...

Meggie - you always make me giggle - I just so love your irreverent take on life - keep it coming please!!!!!!!!!!!!!

velcro said...

thankyou Meggie for that! I love the comments on the dog. As for your Jesus in the Concrete - spray it with hairspray to fix the chalk and then quick phone the local radio station :)

Lone Grey Squirrel said...

Meggie, this is sacrilege! You have obviously defaced the image of Elvis. Millions of fans will be crushed. You should have sold the image and exploited said fans. They would have been so happy! ;)

Aunty Evil said...

OMG Meggie, it's Bert Newton!! (his hairpiece has slipped onto his face, alright?)

You could make a FORTUNE on ebay with this!!

Angie said...

OMG, Meggie, you are a riot!!! You absolutely crack me up---howls of laughter, tears (where ARE those tissues) of glee, you are just the most fun person---I want to come play at your house! :D NNs' dog is just adorable!!

Tanya Brown said...

Meggie, have I told you that I adore you? And I second or third or fourth the suggestions to get that concrete listed on eBay. It could very well pay for the renovations to your house!

I don't suppose that once you're done training your dogs you could come by my house? I have five parakeets and a child who could no doubt use your touch.

Emma said...

You have Van Gogh on your concrete! That's gotta be worth a couple of bucks!

Lee said...

If it was plastered rather than concrete I would have said Kevin Rudd.

So is this the new retirement plan?

Snow White said...

lmbo hmmm
xx
shona

bluemountainsmary said...

I swear (on Joes' bible) that I had not read this post when I wrote my own this morning - I'll send Joe around to convert you !! Mary

crafty said...

Meggie, you are so funny.

What everyone else said.

I like your big hair pic too.

smilnsigh said...

"As I dont have a religion or an Icon to stand & worship,..."

Nor do I! So you aren't offending me, Hon. In fact, I've got a big smile on my face. :-))))

Mari-Nanci

Alison said...

Yep...fell in love with Mr&Mrs NN's dog. How could you not love this face. to true!
I am collecting quite a few pets among my bloggers.

Lucy said...

You gave us a clue with the music choice at the end, it's none other than Cat Stevens, or Yussef as I believe he is now known
'Oh baby baby it's a wild world...'

fifi said...

(ooops wrong spot)

Holy concrete, it's the Lord Jesus.....

Perhaps that little dog with the smart hat on has been channelling forces of which you have been unaware. No doubt you will have Our Lady of the toast making an appearance. I'd be confiscating the dog's hat and searching its room for religious paraphernalia before John the Baptist appears on the toilet paper.

Thimbleanna said...

You're so funny Meggie! While you're searching for Jesus, you need to make it enjoyable -- how 'bout searching in potato chips??? Or elephant ears -- do you have those where you live?