Wednesday, November 8


This is a picture of a Monarch Butterfly, sent to me by my Best Friend J. I have been promised the loan of a fancy camera for my trip, & so I am hoping I might be able to take some nice pics. I would love to be able to take beautiful photos such as Anty Evil has on her blog!!
This was taken in New Zealand, & I am not sure what the flowers are, but they look a bit like something that is considered a weed over here?

But my photo envy has nothing to do with today's post, really.

When GOM started to go deaf, he just totally refused to acknowledge it. He would pretend to have heard what was said, & make idiotic responses. It got to the stage where the neighbours on the opposite side of the street would wince, from the sound of our TV. You could see the walls shakiing from the sound impact!

I would find excuses to cower in the next room, to bear the volume.

I suspect hours of noisy bars, & loud bands in the Australian Hotel, had done the damage. GOM never minded the loud music, & sounds that would make me cringe in pain, seemed not to bother him at all.

I finally convinced him he needed to have his hearing checked. He had tried for months to deny he was going deaf, & he infuriated me by telling me it was I who was deaf, and that I mumbled, & that other people had bad manners- they wouldnt face him when talking to him. Apparently, all common denial tactics. He felt admitting to a problem was admitting aging!

When he first went to have the tests, he was given some literature to take home, to read & try, while the assessments of his hearing were being made.

This paper included such ludicrous suggestions, as 'Try to work out what has been said, by using the words you think you have heard, & then if you find you cant work it out, ask politely if they could repeat what was said.' Thereby making yourself look a complete, slow witted F***wit- (which they did not say, of course)!! Other such nonsense was suggested as a means to 'hear'.

Finally the assessments were done, & sure enough GOM was quite deaf, & he did need hearing aids. The imrpovement in our relationship was amazing, once I convinced him he needed to actually wear them! He said the resultant sounds were quite startling, & he couldnt believe that the sound of his footsteps was so loud. Apparently this is common, as people usually go deaf slowly, & they dont realise how much sound they have lost. We could at last have the television at a level of comfort.

As he was still working at that stage, he found the sound of machinery too loud with the aids in, so he wouldnt wear them to work. I asked him if he had told his boss, & co workers that he was in fact deaf. NO he said. I suggested it might be a good idea. And I laughed when he told me his boss had told him he just thought he was a grumpy old man who didnt want to listen!!

Now my brother tells me he has deafness, industrially caused, & he is to have assessments done for hearing aids. I am sure he will not be so stubborn, about not wanting to wear them.

When I was first trying to get GOM to go for tests, he told a neighbour's mother that he was far too young for hearing aids- she lifted her hair & showed him she had aids, & had worn them since she was 50!! I think it shocked him.

I dont know why men seem so reluctant to acknowledge they are aging.. Perhaps not all men do??


joyce said...

Nobody wants to get old but maybe men are better at denial.

Anonymous said...

I don't think that it's just men that are reluctant to acknowledge they're aging. My grandmother was terrible about wearing her hearing aids. We were always stomping on the floor or yelling to get her attention!

And that is such a beautiful pic!

aunty evil said...

Hi Meggie, thanks for the rap in your blog! That is a gorgeous photo, and it does look very much like Lantana, as you say, considered a noxious weed here, but still for sale in Flower Power! I know, because I bought one a few years back and have it growing (under control) in my garden.

My dad is in furious denial that he is deaf, although it does at times appear to be selective. He reckons we are all idiots who don't speak clearly enough, so why is it his problem? :)

My husband's grandmother has a lovely hearing aid, still in mint condition, in her drawer, so I don't think it is just men.

My float said...

I think I will go into denial for a while when I am older and hard of hearing. I think I'll adopt one of those trumpet hearing aid things, just for my own amusement!

meggie said...

Hi Everyone! I also have thought about the amusement of having one of those huge trumpets!! They always look so funny on TV.
Am sure they are not.
I loved Aunty Evil's tale of the the grandmother in law & her aid!

GOM has gone to bed in a snit!
Says I put the TV onto a channel- haha, he had the control! I dont care, I am not much enthralled by TV these days- as everyone says, off ratings are NO FUN.

Kim said...

THe butterfly is sitting on that curse otherwise known as Lantana.

h&b said...

Beautiful photo !!!

My DH refuses to have his ears checked also ... *sigh* ...

Alice said...

Beautiful photo - even if the butterfly IS sitting on that wretched Lantana. Shame that it's such a curse because it's so pretty.

I get cranky when my husband doesn't hear, especially as he also says there is nothing wrong with his hearing. Actually, I think he can hear quite well if I get his attention first.

Molly said...

Glad he found out how much better things are when he wears a device that makes everyone stop their mumbling! Same story here with the MIL. Tries to squeeze the last bit of "juice" out of the battery, and so, half the time, might as well put it away in a drawer, for all the good it does..... makes for some hilarious conversations though......shades of Gilda Radner as Emily Latella in the early days of Saturday Night Live......oh, never mind.