Wednesday, July 30

Playground Taunts

Remember the playground chants....
"Cowardy Cowardy Custard"

Well that is how I am feeling right now.

For some time now, our little dog Honey has had a lump on one ear. From time to time she seemed to be bothered by this lump, & would claw away at her ear.

She has been a little prone to dermatitis, & itches in the Spring. I once mentioned the lump to the Vet, when she was in a frenzy of scratching at her ear. The Vet assured me it was not the 'lump', but was sure to be an ear infection, which small dogs are prone to get.

Duly treated, & settled. However the 'lump' has contiued to morhp into something different. It now turns black from time to time, & seems to 'shed' cells, & recover to a pink 'lump'. After a fashion. Lately it has been quite vile looking, so today I took her to have it examined once more.

This time the Vet- a different one- thought perhaps it should be removed. I agreed, & tomorrow, I take my little Honey in for sugery. Albeit minor.

I know I will be on edge all day, until I can collect her again. She seems so tiny, & I hate the thought of her in any pain. She was so quiet in the Vet waiting room. So timid, & frightened. It was as if she knew. I wish our favourite Vet was going to operate. He is so good with her, & she trusts him. Perhaps he will oversee the operation. The Vet we saw this evening is a new one. Honey was not sure about her.

When we came home, Leo seemed full of concern. He sniffed Honey all over, & then paid attention to her ear.
Here, he seems to be saying, "I am OK! I dont need anything - except a good bath & a haircut!!"




Here Honey is saying, "I will just ignore all this hoo ha, & pretend it isn't going to happen!"

The ear on the left in the pic is the one to be operated upon, & the small dark patch, is where the vet took a sample, & it was bleeding when she finished. I hope it is not cancer, & if it is, I hope it is a cancer that can be 'captured'.

*********

Other exchanges today, after a shopping expedition with Hitler resulted in sharp words. The Real Mean Cusswords were brought out, in hurt anger.

The endless sifting through the packets, & tins, for duplications or OUT-of DATE items, drives me crazy. I can hear the furtive movements. I finally go out, to find the whole F***ing pantry rearranged!! Guilty looks, sneaky movements...FFS what is wrong with this man??!!

Our daughter is a homecare worker, she deals with people like this every day. I think her blood runs as cold as mine, in worry & wonder. Her Grandmother went 'nuts'. She was officially diagonsed with Alzheimers. She may have just had dementia. She took years to die. She drove all who had contact with her to the point of almost-insanity, trying to cope with her 'insanity'. Her sad, 'missing-ness'. It is so hard, to realise the person to whom you speak, has no real clue as to what you mean.

That sounds callous, but I dont mean it to be. I can't retell here, the trauma & suffering it caused to so many. I try not to think about it. I try to deny it is happening 'close to home'. But, ... I do have to wonder....

Yet, there are the bright & happy periods of normalcy. When you tell yourself you imagined the 'dodgy bits'.

I screeched at him today, that I have to leave. I cannot live with his 'oddness'. His bloody minded cruelty.

'Where would you go?' he snaps. 'You have nowhere'. It all gets too sad.

Then, the tenative apologies. The peace moves. I am too tired. I am too sad. I have not got the energy, to bolster someone else's ego.

Tomorrow, I will keep vigil for my Honey.

Pheobe Snow, Keep a Watch On the Shoreline.

Tuesday, July 29

Just like a baby....

Just like a baby, wind makes me grouchy. No, not the same type of wind!

The type that gets me grumpy is the weather type. It seems to be singing an evil thin song, as it sweeps down from the Mountains, & over the snowfields in the South, to make me shiver & cringe, here on the East Coast of New South Wales.

I will blame if for stagnating my quilting urge. I will blame it for making me sleep late, thereby losing half my day!

Gom & I both slept late. That is not usually my way, & I feel as if I have lost time I needed. Gom says the fact that I slept, must mean I needed the sleep. Hmmn. Perhaps he is right.

He got the vacuum cleaner out, bless his heart, & vacuumed all the floors. The vacuum is one of his toys. He likes to control it, & he recently bought a new 'Turbo' contraption to use on the hose. It seemed very good initially. When I saw him sitting with the pieces, my heart sank, & I thought 'oh well, there goes $60'.

When I dared mention that, I got snapped at, told he didn't pay $60 yes, he did, but I can't be bothered proving it!. It turned out the hose pipe was blocked, & after he reassembled the Turbo, & unblocked the pipe, the thing was sucking like crazy, & he was delighted with his toy again, & very proud of the 'repair'.

Well... if it keeps him happy, who am I to groan. He saves my back a lot of pain, by taking over the vacuuming, & that is one thing I am happy to let him control.

We went to visit our Granddaughter yesterday. She is looking a lot better now her Chicken Pox spots are beginning to fade. She has carefully avoided scratching her face, as she didnt want any scars. When her mother was little she clawed a great hole in her forehead, which did leave a scar & it has only just seemed to disappear.

I took my daughter's quilt, but she was not home, so I will have to get a photo of it another time. She later rang me to tell me how much she loves it, so it has a good home. I told her that Honey had test driven it, & given it the stamp- er- paw of approval!

I have been blog jogging this morning, & when I went to Lindi's blog, I discovered she has a Giveaway on there, of some patterns. Just what I need to freshen up my jaded talent!

Here is Lindi's link. http://lindijanej.blogspot.com/ Please go visit her, & leave her a comment, who knows you might win her prize.
She also has a list of some other giveaways. You have to be in to win!

**************
What ever happened to all those colourful things people used to say?
Those almost-curses. The ones you could say in front of your Grandmother. Or even some of the ones you wouldn't say in front of your Grandmother.

"Hell's Teeth"
"By the Cringe" (this one was taught to me by a Scotsman, & I don't think it really has any meaning, but it sounded wonderful in his rich accent!)
"By Crikey"
"Bugger bugger bum" Not for my Grandmother's ears! She got upset if we said Hell or Damn!
"You give me the screaming Mimi's" Not really sure what mimi's are but could hazard a guess...

Some of my favourites are calling someone "clown features". I caught Gom calling another driver that name & I burst out laughing. He grinned & said he has lived with me too long! Harmless really, but nevertheless, a favourite with me.

My Granddaughter, when quite small, invented one insult we now use,
"You Scungey Baghead" We have no idea where she learnt that & it cracked us all up!

Off to rug up against the blasted wind.


Randy Crawford, Almaz

Sunday, July 27

What the ???

OK, I am in a confession mood.

I know I may be in danger of being stoned, or thrown out of some quilting circles.

Or the cake making circles I never joined in the first place! haha.

But I don't find I have any connection with Civil War Reproduction Fabrics. I find them rather dull, & gasp boring.
I am not sure if it is because I don't feel any connection with the American Civil War, or because of the dull colours. I just dont 'get it'?

The extremely drear colours, just don't appeal to me. My soul craves bright, cheery, even dazzling, colours.

Perhaps it is because the countries I have live in, did not have a "Civil War". The light, & the sun are brighter? I just don't understand the lack of feeling I have for those fabrics.

Maybe it is the same lack of feeling I had for movie stars? Or singing stars? Just 'famous', in a world that did not involve, or engage me?

I can admire people who use those fabrics for their patchwork, or quilts. I don't, however, want to join them or use any of those brown & humble fabrics.

Dare I confess, I have never wanted to do a Dear Jane?? gasp horror, shoot her at dawn! But how many of you agree with me? In secret, mind you!

Why would I? When I have a world of Brights to choose from? A whole new world of dazzling colours & prints? I must be a 'Strictly Modern Millie'!!


Another confession I have, is relating to "CUP CAKES"!!!

I really don't get the obsession with these things??

I realise these pictured above, are really Butterfly Cakes, in the Southern Hemisphere. Made with dobs of Sponge mix in little cup cake pans. Then you cut the tops off, & plaster them with cream & maybe some jam, before returning the tops in butterfly mode. They are a PIA to make, & quite frankly, "Life is too bloody short!!"

These pictured below, are Cup Cakes of another variety. They can also be made with dobs of sponge mixture, or whatever cake of the day, takes your fancy. Slather them with enough sickly/garish toppings, & you have CUP CAKES!! TA DA!!!!


In Spite of all the fancy toppings, they are usually rather dry. They can make an adult- or child- gag. They can, actually, become rather sickening.
I might be heard in the background, muttering, where is the dip? Where are the cheesy bits? The savouries?
Yes, OK, I know some of those can be sickening too. But they seem way more attractive than sweets... dry, or not!
There are other things I could confess to, but hell, enough is enough, about soul-baring, & exposing the ugly or deficient bits..
Give me some of your secret confessions.
I promise, I wont stand in judgement. I always urge my quitl recipients to bear in mind, the quilt in question, was made by a very clay footed human!!
"Let he who is without", & all that jazz....
Bob Dylan, I Shall Be Released.
















Friday, July 25

There Was a Little Girl..

Remember the Nursery Rhyme





"There was a little girl,


Who had a little curl


Right in the middle of her forehead.





When she was good,


She was very very good,


But when she was bad, she was horrid."







The Shirley Temple look was still fashionable when I was a little girl. Curls seemed to be desirable. I had the blond hair but the stick straightness seemed most unfair.



Coupled with the fact that my mother lied to me, telling me if I ate those dry horrible crusts off the bread, my hair would grow curls.



I believed her, & in later years I told her I thought she had committed child abuse, or at least cruelty, by lying to me, & she had further decieved me, by telling me my hair was getting curly.


It was a strange fact that the usual childhood accidents that befell me were all deemed to be my 'fault'. I had a broken bone, from a fall, yes, my fault. I had a severed fingertopwell it was almost severed, someone stuffed it back on, & just bandaged it up. It aches today, & I suspect it now has arthritis. It was, of course, my 'fault'.

The almost skinned off heel - I'll take the blame for that. On & on it went.

Of course, the truth was, they were all just accidents. They were nobody's 'fault'.

When my children had their share of childhood accidents, I tended to quickly tell them it was my fault. Though of course if I was not present, I couldn't take the blame, but I kept assuring them it was not their fault. Surely, an accident is just that. No one needs to be 'at fault'.

I quickly reassure my grandchildren, it is no one's fault. Accidents happen. That is they way of life.

Today's odd sight was an elderly woman, dressed up smartly for the winter chills. Woollen trousers, nice woollen coat. Woolly scarf. The surprise to me, was her almost violent, Leopard skin patterned handbag, with leopard skin patterned shoes. I kept wondering what could possess an elderly woman to choose an animal print for handbag & shoes.

****************

Our Adult Granddaughter has now got ChickenPox. Passed on by her small brother no doubt. She is very spotted, & very miserable. It certainly looks as if she is much worse then her brother had been.

He is well over his bout, has been back at school, & is bouncing all over the place. He & Granddog Oscar were having a game of tag, when we went to visit.




*****************

This is the flimsy of "Rainbow for Joey-Lee". A nickname for our daughter. I was making it in secret for her, as I know she just loves brights. She visited us yesterday, & caught me with the quilt on the table being basted, ready for quilting. She was overjoyed when she found out it is hers. Now I have to get busy quilting & get it bound & completed.




I played around with placement of blocks, & in the end just 'went for it.' I rather wish I had looked at a photo of placement before I sewed it all together. Never mind, I know it will be loved & enjoyed.

It is not Art, it is Utility. Combined with Love. No idea how I am going to quilt it, but it wont be anything fancy.



John Denver, This Old Guitar.

Thursday, July 24

The Backwaters of the Mind

"Where is the Olive Oil?"
"What Olive Oil?" feigning ingnorance.
"What do you mean, 'What Olive Oil?' The Olive Oil that lives here? That I use for cooking!"
"I don't know. I haven't seen it."

Of course he hasn't. It lives in the exact same spot on the bench in the 'business corner' of the kitchen, every day. It has always resided there. We may buy different brands, but nevertheless, it all lives in the exact same location.

"Don't tell me you threw it out?"
"Well if the bottle was on the 'rubbish side' of the bench, I may have." Note, careful non-admission of guilt. He would have made a good lawyer. Deny Deny Deny.

Meggie stumps off down the stairs to investigate the bin. Yes, there is the bottle, half full. Lying on top of cardboard, & newspapers. How could Gom not notice that the bottle was half full? I had been preparing a potato dish. I used a little olive oil in the dish. He had swooped into the kitchen like the Kitchen Nazi, & whisked the offending bottle-in-the-wrong-location off to the garbage bin! I had probably put the dish on to cook, & momentarily left the kitchen.


We seem to be into the 'business end' of winter. It has got very much colder. It began raining yesterday, after being bitterly cold & cheerless for the day. I was very glad to get into the 'Oven' yesterday, & cook a spell. I am beginning to wonder if the UV light is having a beneficial effect. I havn't had the urge to claw myself apart since Saturday.

It is pouring with rain this morning, & seems to be getting colder since I got up at 6.45am. I have a little heater I use in this room. I am thinking of turning on the ducted air to warm our living area.

I dreamt vividly last night. Another new house. More unexpected rooms, & much space to delight me. Neighbour guests invited themselves to visit & barged in the front door. How curious. I sneaked away & left Gom to entertain them, - or not. This house was situated close to the beach front. It was built for a lot of family or friends to inhabit. There was a pool, & a wonderful garden. Some of the rooms remained furnished, & what delights they contained.

Sometimes I have a better life in my dreams than I do in reality! This particular dream had all sorts of interesting side diversions. The police came to see if we had seen a person drown. There had been a body found in the surf. They told us we were now living among the 'others'. I have an idea they meant that in a racist way.


A chance to observe humanity is always welcome.

The Biker couple, dismounting the huge bike. She, shakes out her long, Ruby Henna-dyed hair, as she removes her helmet. He, sporting a wild & woolly black & grey beard, removes his helmet, & shakes out.... his Ruby Hennaed hair!!
I smiled at the image, all the way home. They were not young Bikers. They had reached portly middle age. They must have invested considerable $$ outlay, in their leather outfits, as they surely would have had to be custom made, to accommodate added girth of the years. I will say, they both looked happy! They were not going to be 'Grey' Nomads!


It was so warm in the car, once the heater began to work, I urged Gom to 'go for a drive'. He, ever mindful of the price of petrol, declined my urging. Home we came. Let the dogs inside, & they seemed very grateful to be in the warmth.

We watched a DVD, Chaos Theory. It was quite harrowing in parts. I enjoyed most of it except of course those parts when drowsiness overtook, in the warm haze of the artificially heated air. Gom snarls me awake, & so if I get away with snoozing a little, & don't get caught, I can't exactly backtrack to catch up! Of course, it is a different story if he snoozes. With a DVD, he can't use his classic, "The commercials were on!" I don't say much, best keep the peace.

We both laughed when we read an article stating that aftery surveys, & much research, it has been discovered that old men are much Grumpier than old women. We could have attested to that - freely too, thus saving much money wasted on the research! haha.



Bob Dylan, Forever Young

Tuesday, July 22

Blinked- or is that Blinkered?

It seems I blinked a bit, & there was a whole new world of blogs waiting to be read, & I am dragging the chain, here.

Firstly, I was awarded again, by Ann of Ancient One's Place. I humbly thank you Ann, for the Award. I have been given this attractive award recently, but I still appreciate the thought. Please pay a visit to Ann. I am supposed to award this to 7 other awardees, & share it about. I find I cannot limit myself to 7.. it just wouldn't be fair.

I was also given this Award by Tanya, The Art Butcher. Thankyou Tanya, I love this too. I do in fact return the award to you, as your posts either have me choking to death or at least wanting tissues to mop the tears- laughter mostly, but not always. I would urge readers to visit Tanya, also.
I know the rules state that I should nominate other 7 & 5 other bloggers, respectively, & pass this along, but there are also a lot of folk who don't wish to be awarded or go through the agony of choosing recipients, so if you are reading this, please take the awards, & I know you will be worthy recipients.

**************
I have been quite busy, head down, bum up, as 'they' say.
Saturday was a beautiful sunny day here, very mild. I found it rather chilly in the house, but outside was beautiful. I basted a quilt ready to be quilted, outside on the patio table having cleaned off the assorted bird poo, & the dog pee stains, where Leo had jumped on the table, because Gom forgot to tilt the chairs.

I wanted to sew, so I decided to give the 'new' garage-sale-find-sewing machine a good workout. I took it outside, & set it up on the clean table, & sat for the afternoon quilting in the sun. It was wonderful, & the 'new' machine sewed like an absolute dream. It seems to have a hair-trigger foot control too, so it is very zippy indeed. I love it, & am very glad to have it as a backup should anything untoward happen to my Janome. The new one is a Brother Electronic, My Star 3. I paid $25 for it, & it is worth every cent!!

I am still hell bent on keeping up the sewing. Spent Saturday evening binding the newly made quilt, & Sunday morning I made a label, & it is all ready to be gifted to the recipient.

Sunday afternoon, we had welcome guests over, & we had a great time. Fun, & laughter. Laughter being the best medicine, I could not understand why I felt so tired yesterday.

I still sewed a good part of the day, but sat down to watch a DVD, & dozed off where I sat. Gom prompted me awake several times. I was off to bed early last night, & yet I am still really sleepy today. It might be the antihistamines, but I only take them at night, for the itch.


Here is progress on the back of the next one to finish I think. I had never made a Rail Fence block before, but looked at the extreme scrappiness of my stash, & decided now was the time to make one. It is very bright colours, & I think I might give it to my daughter, who is always wanting more quilts!

Here is "A Dream for Jas". It is completed, & ready to be gifted. I am pleased with the result. I feel it will always have the sun inside it, as I sat outside to quilt it, in the wonderful warming rays.
Honey 'Test drove' it on Sunday morning, & she gave it her approval. She looked quite peeved when I told her it is not for her.

Perhaps she is feeling the cold snap we are now experiencing, since her clipping. She certainly looks a smaller dog, but I have not clipped it too short, so she shouldn't be too cold.



>>>>>A side track here. I often think about the English language, & the use of words, some of which have many meanings, which I am sure makes it difficult for others to learn the language.

I find there are many words I dislike. For no particular reason. One of those words is 'scant'. There was a scant amount. She was scantily clad. There was scant space for a foothold.

No, I just don't like it.
Have you got words you dislike?


Joe Cocker, Hitchcock Railway.




Sunday, July 20

Just An Udder Filler Post.


Couldnt help myself.
TCA, Mike, & many others, whose links you will find at Reverand Anaglyph or Mike's. They are responsible.

Normal transmission should resume before too long.

Friday, July 18

A Shambles of sorts...or, Confessions of a messer.

Warning! The following photos may cause extreme anxiety to "Neat Freaks"! or, even just normal folks!

OK. I have warned you all, so I feel I can now safely continue.


Having visited Mike's place, & seen his neat, plus his art, I thought to be a devil & show my extreme messy, along with some almost art.

These were taken evening. There are 3 projects underway, & they are being worked on simultaneously.

I am sure the 'neatniks' among you, will cringe in utter horror! Note the leg of the tired Bear, who guards the remote-come-scissor-holder, near the top left of the pic.
The top of the ironing board, with more shambles on a chest in the back ground. Gom comes to the door, gasps in horror, & retreats off back to his book or his TV viewing.or to tidy his endlessly-being-tidied garage- which at the moment is similar to my mess, because of a leaking shower pipe, in the downstairs shower, & the resulting disarray while the repairs are being very very slowly under-taken. The Plumber has the 'flu, & he is a friend, so no pressure on completion dates!
Now that I have 'bared all' so to speak, I feel better! Ha Ha.

Hopefully, I will have some finishes to show, but the flow has been interrupted today.

We had an electricity outage for most of the day, due to a replacement of a decaying wooden Power Pole. The one right outside our place is actually in far worse condition, but 'they' in their infinite wisdom, decided to replace the other one!

I even scrambled eggs for Gom, for brekky, but he declined the eggs. Oh well, more for me. ( I forgot, & added parsely, which he is not so keen about.) He had the coffee & toast I made him. Because of the power being off, he had to rise an hour earlier than usual, & he was a bit grumpy about that.

After my "cooking" session, in the skin treatment Tardis, we proceeded to the shops. A small business matter attended, I decided to see if it was my lucky day for a haircut.

Now of course, if you read here often, you will know of the agony of haircuts. However I seem to have found a hairdresser who 'knows his onions', so to say. He also seems to train his young assistants to recognise their 'onions'. Last time the girl did an excellent cut. Today, the Master cut my hair, & I am very pleased with the result. It is not too short, & the style is just what I wanted. A minor miracle.

Now, I am a great 'hater' of fast food outlets, mostly because I can't bear the thought of the 'food' they serve. I have never cared for hamburgers in any form. though, to be honest here, I used to make them for our children, & ourselves, & of course chose what I deemed to be 'healthy' versions, & our kids, & Gom loved them! I loathe the buns, & everything else about the commercial versions.

I think the power of advertising has rotted our heads, however. We jointly decided we would not mind trying the Wraps advertised by a certain McD's place. It is perhaps the first or second, time I have ever eaten there, in any country- neither time did I eat 'burger'.

Today, it was rather chilly, & so, having no electricity at home, we drove to the local Golden Arches. We dined in-house. In our 10+ years of living here, it is the first time we have ever been there! We had the wraps, 'Taste of Asia', I think they were called. They were delicious. The coffee, while not wonderful, was drinkable. And the 'fries' were lovely. (We managed to restrain ourselves from buying the current earth polluting plastic toys!)

I spent the remainder of the afternoon, capturing, & trimming Honey. She is a most reluctant participant in any of this. She dislikes everthing about it, the brush, the scissors, the kidding & lying. The nail clipping was not accomplished, so she is still long in the claw. Why does she let strangers cut her nails??

On the other hand, I have a dream of having a pedicure. strangers can cut my nails anytime! I want someone to cut my toenails, & give me a foot massage. I suppose I can dream on. I suspect I might be developing a hip fault, which prevents an easy tending of one foot. One is fine, but the other presents a problem.

I dislike having long toenails. I have a nephew whose 'excitement', or 'tension' activity, was to trim his toenails! I used to go shopping with my mother, who invariably cut her toenails at the end of a long day's shopping. If I have to be on my feet for prolonged periods, I notice the length of my toenails, if they are long.

I do not understand people who can wear their toenails long?? How about you?

My Granddaughter likes to paint my toenails at Christmas. It takes at least 6 months for the polish to grow off! I love to see surprised reactions when she paints different colours, & I wear sandals! Usually, no one comments, but I see their eyes return again & again to the nails. Inwardly, I chuckle.


The Verve, Album, Urban Hymns. Sad I know, but I love the melodies, particularly Bitter Sweet Symphony, & Velvet Morning.

Wednesday, July 16

A Few Free Treats.

This morning seemed a lovely clear day. As I hung out washing to dry, I noticed some free treats, & thought I would share some of them.

Blogger had other ideas about the order of uploading the pics, so something, which I hope is going to be a free treat for someone, is a look at a quilt top. It just has to be sandwiched & basted, quilted & bound.

It is a Dream & as is often the way with such things, it made itself as it grew. There are stars to wish upon, friends for company, & butterflies to carry the owners dreams.

I seemed to suddenly get the sewing mojo back yesterday, & spent most of the day working on this quilt top. It had been bit stalled, but suddenly decided to move forward!

This is a little treat I discovered on the pitiful little Azalea, & so I rushed in fro the camera. I think it is exquisite, & it is sort of cup shaped. Must be a small spider, as it is a small web.




This, last evening. Do we 'treat' our animals?? Do you think? Gom called to me to take the pic, -"You have now show of getting your seat!"
True, they had my cushions, & the quilt I sometimes use, & were indeed looking very cosy.

Another morning treat. The heavy dew on a lemon leaf.

A place where little secret beings dwell...

Vapours, rising like the misty dreams that vanish with the wakening day.

(which reminds me, I dreamt I picked up 2 $2 coins somewhere? in last night's dream. How odd)

Shame about the neighbour's phallic symbol tree, huh? Which is home to Mynah birds, horrible creatures they are. I think the pole is an aerial of some sort.

******************

We have been out to the 'oven' for my skin.

Off to visit the Butcher for meat items. I gag when I enter the shop, & I can't help myself, I feel a little tremor for all the creatures that die for man's greed. I once knew a man who pondered such things, who suggested the animals were happy to die, as long as we offered their spirits thanks. He seemed to feel it was their 'reason for being'.

I am not sure what I believe about that thought. It is a bit like telling a clergy man that "My Invisible Friend is Better than Your Invisible Friend."

*******

I have noticed lately, that some of the Free things we get in life, are not Treats at all.

One is the far-too-loud thumpity music played in shops. It is like being assaulted to have to listen to that! Complaint seems to bring vacant surprise. I suppose they don't even hear it, or perhaps are so deaf from the constant noise, it doesn't register.

When we visited the Market, there was a young band of lads, playing their hearts out. I suspect they were quite talented in a young way. The songs they were imitating were good cover versions. The volume was horrendous though! It was also unfortunate that they were situated beside a seating area, so, being blasted was unavoidable. The stalls directly opposite were far too painful to visit! The sheer noise almost knocked me flat! I felt as it I had been beaten about the head, if I got in line with the full volume.

This day is so blue, & so clear & crisp. I am off to sew some more.

Jeff Buckley, Hallelujah.



Friday, July 11

Any Day Now..

Any day now, I will change my headline banner. Any day now, I might change the photo signature I have.

Everyone gets bored. They want change, the new, the different. The novel.

This does make me wonder about the average life of a blog. I read it is about 2-3 years at most. Perhaps I am at the end of my 'tether'?

I have gone to visit some, I felt I had some connection with, only to find it is either shut down, or 'invitation only'. And, you know what is coming... I am 'not invited'. WTF???
OK moving right along...

A question I have pondered, is, when do we learn to become 'embarrassed'? It must be a learned behaviour, emotion, state,- call it what you will.

A friend once told me his small girl-child- under one year- sat in her highchair, broke wind, loudly. He said he & his wife laughed, & when they looked at the child, she was blushing! He said she continued to be so sensitive, & he had never imagined a child to be so aware. How do we learn embarrassment?

How do we learn, what is socially acceptable , & what is not?

And when we learn we are not invited on the basketball team, or the secret society for blah or blah.
Do we laugh, or do we cry?

I think I tend to laugh. Rather after the mode of
'PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON'T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT ME AS A MEMBER. '

I never wanted to be a 'joiner'. I don't suppose I will ever want to be a 'joiner.'



Today, we watched a movie. Helen Hunt. "Then She Found Me". I loved it. Gom hated it. Chalk & Cheese. As usual.

***************
The Glow.


We all know "the Glow".
You feel it when you meet someone, & instantly you feel 'the glow'. You know this person is magic, beyond your wildest dreams.
You know this person will transform your life.
Their thoughts, their ideas, ... & yes, their body, will transform your life. Forever.

If you are lucky, you languish in that glow. You enjoy the sensual moments of that glow.
You can actually 'wallow', in that glow. wallow is such a sensual word, when you stop to ponder. You can feel that ebb & flow, the wonderful currents, swirling about your body, in giddying eddies...How intoxicating.. How intriguing. The comfortable 'wallowing', better than a bath...

The perfumes, of seduction.. the wonderful scents, of delights, yet to be found...
Perhaps, the smell of the perfect being's body. How can you define desire? lust? longing? sensuality?
Perhaps you can't define such things??


Memories.

Neil Diamond, Barbra Striesand, You Dont Bring Me Flowers AnyMore.

Wednesday, July 9

Another view, from the window...


To me, this vista is spoilt, with the telegraph pole in the scene. It is a fact of our modern lives. It is to be 'lived with'. Ugly though. I don't have to like it. May have to accept it, but the 'hippie' in me protests.
This next photo is the wider view. No telegraph poles. Is it real?

I hear the TV bleating about brain disorders. Alzhiemers. A subject close to my life. A Mother-in Law who suffered, &, eventually died from the disease. It took years. Who knows the pattern of this terrible disease.

I tend to see this as the vista, more preferred. No Alzhiemers. No dementia.

Just huge threats?? Perhaps the wrong end of the telescope. I am sure. But...

********************

We have very different tastes, the Gom & I. In all sorts of areas.

He likes RED meat. I don't. He loves Red, as a colour. I don't.

We can mostly overcome our differences, & agree to disagree. Certainly about food, ... as a rule.

I cooked a chicken dish, Coq au Vin. A Classic. Which I have cooked, & served, to acclaim, to guests.

Gom's verdict was.... "Bloody awful."

Wha???this man obviously has a death wish!

If you have ever cooked a classic dish for someone, & been met with such a response, I wonder how you felt/would feel?

The hurling of food is foreign to my nature. Occasionally, I will be forced out of my comfort Zone.

I was about to say I have never hurled food at the Gom, but I take that back. There was that one occasion, when he wore mashed potato, on his eyelashes, as he blinked-in utter surprise!- & it jiggled in his nostrils, & eyebrows, as they rose & fell in rage. But happy as that image may be to contemplate, it was shortlived. He blinked it all away, & sneered as I cleaned the extras off the cupboard. The joys of early marriage are such treasured memories!!

I would like to think it taught him the limits of my tolerance. But WTH?? He is a man, & they just don't get those warning signs.

*************

On other fronts, I narrowly missed being annihilated under a car, this morning, on the way to Heat/Light therapy. I cursed the slowness of the f***ing driver. I could have been dispatched to the land of the lost! Bugger!

I told the nurse, enquiring of my feckingnon progress, that I will be divorced before a cure or answer is found. Sympathetic clicking noises were heard from her throat. I had the heat. I left, feeling more inclined to think it some sort of ^$***%&*%%% con!!

Sod.

Beatles, Strawberry Fields Forever.

Tuesday, July 8

Trivial Scribbles

A collection of the everyday trivia, that makes up most of our lives.
I was so happy to recieve an email yesterday, informing me that the gift quilts had been recieved, & were duly allotted to their recipients.

Raspberry Ripple was claimed by the eldest girl, & I could just imagine her with this quilt.

I Spy went to the younger sister, who was delighted to discover she could play with it as an I Spy game. I am told they went to sleep last night, respectively covered by their quilts, & so I hope they enjoy them.
I was very relieved to hear they had arrived safely, as I made a silly mistake when addressing them, but no harm was done, & their safe arrival was good news.


********************
The weekend was lovely, with Sunday being one of those 'out of the box' days. Clear skies, warm sun, little wind, & warm warm temperatures.

We travelled up to the Hunter Valley, to the Maitland Markets, which are a once a month event. It is a huge Market, with many traders. It takes some stamina to 'do' the Market. We overheard a man on his mobile phone telling someone it is the largest outdoor Market in the Souther Hemisphere. I dont know about that, but it is quite wearying to cover, & I confess, we didn't manage the whole of it!

We travelled on further up? down? the Hunter River, to a small historic town called Morpeth, which is faithfully preserved, in as original state, as it can be. This was once a busy port for the Hunter Valley, & has many lovely old buildings, which have either been restored, or retain their original condition. Lots of Antiques for sale- for large sums- equating to their age!! A lot of Craft stores too, & old wares for sale. A township which is not 'done' in a mere afternoon. We have vowed to return on a quieter day. It was very crowded, & some of the small shops, crammed with goodies, could not be inspected at enough of a liesurely pace, or enough viewing space, to be done justice.

We lunched outdoors in the hot sun, & really enjoyed the relaxed atmosphere, & the wonderful sun. Considering it is Mid Winter, it was very mild! Food is quite an industry, in Morpeth on a Sunday, with many wonderfully fresh meal outlets competing for custom. We were very happy with our choice of venue.

I did take my camera, & was dismayed to discover most of my photos did not register. Idiocy on the part of the photographer I am sure, because 2 of them are excellent! I had hoped to include some, when I did a post. Oh well, next time, as they say.

*************************

Another little matter of interest, is the 'hoarding' of 'things'.

Recently Gom & I have been having some 'serious' discussions. Maybe even 'grave' discussions is a term which could be used. he will be in the grave, if he doesn't lighten up!!

I have .... well, yes, I will call it 'mess' in my computer/sewing machine room. I don't regard it as 'mess', but it seems Gom does.
He has become so obsessed with neat that he puts the hairdryer away, while I am in the middle of drying my hair!! WTH?? & he used to be such a slob! His shoes might have spent weeks where he left them, had I not become fed up, & moved them. His clothes, shed at odd places, could languish in dirty disarray, had I not come along, & in exasperation, washed them.

When he was moaning about the ironing board being up, & looking 'untidy' when guests arrived, I pointed out to him I was using it, for my quilting. I also pointed out that I live in this house! I am not running it as a show home! I am actually living here! It is clean, though often untidy. It is lived in!! He used to be so untidy before he retired. He never cared what 'visitors might think'. I still don't worry. If they came to judge my house, well, ....they can leave.

There is just one grizzle I have. All the pictures we have on our walls are crooked, as a matter of course. No matter what I do, or how careful I am, they never remain straight. Of course I have given up caring, mostly, about this fact. Occasionally when someone comments, I will tell them that I can't fix the problem. If it really bothers them, they can try to set things straight.... or they can leave! Simple really.

***********

A footnote to the light torturetherapy.
There is no relief. My GP was quite surprised I have been given no diagnosis. The blood tests offer no indications or answers... which is a disappointment! I had to undergo that trauma for nothing??
Anyhow, the naked trauma goes on. The staff are very, very, very, nice!! I am bolstered by their lovely manner, & hope the feckingblinkety blink treatments work!!

***************************

We had SG -Small Grandson- for the morning today, & what a treat he was. He did all sorts of things, & helped me do some dishes. He asked me if he was a good helper, & I assured him he was excellent. I had not seen him for a time, & it was lovely to have him here.
He gives me so much joy, just by being!


Ben Harper, Diamonds on the Inside.

Friday, July 4

You know your guests are truly relaxed when...

You know your guest is truly relaxed, when they can sit & pick their ear, & examine the pickings, with ease, & that you have succeeded as a hostess, in making them feel truly at ease, & at home.

Or, if, they can divulge the answers to questions you have long wished to enquire about, but have refrained from the asking. If they volunteer this information, you know they must trust you. You hide your glee, along with your further dismay, as you are intrigued by the information divulged. As opposed the information not yet divulged, which makes said info already divulged, somewhat irrelevant.

My Gosh Life can get very complicated! Perhaps the Captian Klink, is the best judge... I Know Nothing!

We all 'know nothing'. Do we not!

Roy Orbison, Falling.

Thursday, July 3

The First....

This morning, I decided to treat myself to poached eggs on Crumpets. I really like poached eggs, & hardly ever have them. I do enjoy crumpets, preferrable to bread or toast, somehow.

Not liking butter, I use margarine, but I rarely have Crumpets as a sweet treat.




As I enjoyed my breakfast, I was reminded of the "magic" first time I ever had Crumpets.
I would have been perhaps 5 or 6. My mother took me with her, on a trip to our nearest City, to do some shopping. She promised me a 'special Treat'. It was to be a 'surprise'.

Of course I was so excited, I could barely contain myself. Having learnt that nagging or persistant questions tended to dull the promised delight, I carefully kept quiet.

To set the scene, you must remember that this was post War New Zealand. (WW2). New Zealand was a small country, on the 'bottom' of the world. The 'Treats' were few & far between, & very plain fare was the order of the day. I suppose the Americans may have introduced new ideas (ketchup??) & new foods to the country, as they were stationed in New Zealand periodically, the war having progressed to the South Pacific Region, with the involvement of America, through the Japanese bombing of Pearl Harbour.

My mother says I owe my life to an American Serviceman, who caught my very pregnant mother, as she fell, on a steep set of steps, leading up to the Central Post Office, in Auckland. She felt forever grateful, & was sure, that, had she fallen, I would have been no more!

Here I digress. Back to Crumpets- & not the American version either!

Having completed shopping requirements, my mother declared we were going to have lunch. It was a cold day, with cold winds off the harbour. A small Cafe, facing the Harbour. We entered the warm Cafe, steamy windows attesting the cold outside temperatures. Seated at a small table. My mother ordering Crumpets & Honey. A pot of tea for her, a 'Soft drink' for me. I have forgotten what the drink was, probably orange. Fizzy Orange. Or 'Creaming Soda', perhaps an American addition, to the bottled, aerated drink selection.

What, I wondered, were "Crumpets"? I had never heard of them.

When they arrived I looked in astonishment at the round shapes, full of holes! Glistening with butter, & the Honey, fallen through the holes.

But,- Oh! the blissful magic of that first taste!! It will never leave my memory. I had never before encountered such a lovely, exotic, strange, unusual, thing! The holes, perfect for soaking the honey! The wonderful light texture! Surely a magic gift!

Today, when I eat Crumpets, I tend to like them savoury, such as with poached eggs. Or Baked Beans. Or Eggs & Bacon.

Every time I see them though, I am transported back, to my first taste of Crumpets, with the magic!! I can never recapture that first bliss, but I can still recall the memory of the bliss!

**********

The posting of the gift quilts is accomplished. Now I have to wait to hear of their arrival.

I am working on another gift quilt.

My Son sent me a link to a discourse on possession as a 'habit'. Or a state of being. It discusses the idea of an article 'being', as opposed to an article as 'being mine'. It discusses the idea of monkeys & possession. If something is gifted, it becomes the property of the 'owner'. If it is not gifted, it remains the property of the maker, or previous or original owner.

I have often pondered this, as I have made various items I have, & various items I have made, knowing I am gifting them. I don't feel any sense of 'mourning' or 'loss' if I have specifically made those articles for giving.

Is this confusing? Gom just came racing in, read some of the text, & told me it is 'crap', to use one of his technical terms, haha!

Does anyone else know what I mean? I feel quite detached to an item I have decided to make as a gift, whereas, if I make it for me, I feel very attached. Mind you, some things I make, to give away, I find I feel very attached to, in spite of knowing that item will be a gift!

Roy Orbison, Blue Bayou.



Tuesday, July 1

Mail, Treasure, & Sewing.

We have had some lovely balmy days. Not very Wintery, for this time of year. A gentle warm breeze, & some beautiful blue skies & sunny days. We are warned it is all about to go pear-shaped, so at least we can be grateful we have had such a nice break/


Monday brought treasure in the mail. How excited I was to recieve a packet in the mail from England. I had been told it had been posted, & was quite impressed with the speedy delivery!



Inside the parcel was this lovely treasure from Quilting Bebbs. It is so sweet, & every bit as lovely in 'person' as it looks in the picture. I was the lucky person to win this on a giveaway Anne had.

Anne's work is lovely, so neat & her stitching is perfect. Just the thing to perk up winter days. I love strawberries!

I have been very busy sewing, working away on gift quilts. I have finished, & even labelled one I Spy quilt, ready to give away. I chose a cheqered patterned fabric for the binding, as I thought it a little like a snake to go around the jungly border. I am quite happy with the way it finished, & I have backed it with flannelette for warmth, & snuggles. My daughter made the first I Spy quilt I ever saw, for her daughter, & we all had so much fun playing with it. A good way to dispel some boredom.


I decided to finish this quilt instead of the other I Spy. As the recipients are sisters, I thought they might like something different, & perhaps can share. I love this quilt & am very happy with they way it has finished too. I decided to call it Raspberry Ripple. I love the colours.
It is also backed with flannelette, for cuddles.

I hope both quilts will be enjoyed & loved.


*************

Skin update number blahtey blah blah.

Finally got to see Specialist. He was stunned to see the referral letter was written in February! Perhaps I should have explained how it came to be, that I could not get an appointment until now! Perhaps he doesn't realise how busy he is!


As it was, I apologised for the disgusting letter of referral. It was handwritten, in illegible writing, & the page was covered in masses of blobs of ink, from a leaky printer. I don't think he could quite believe the state of it either!


As it happened when I went to see my GP, in desperation, for a referral for the Specialist, GP was away on holiday. Consequently the Doctor I saw was a relieving GP. He seemed to be very disgruntled with a lot of things, the printer not least, leaking it's ink as it was.

Isn't it funny how we become loyal to those we like. I felt quite indignant at the criticism implied, & offended to think he was making noises of disapproval. It so happens we really like our GP. We feel really comfortable with him, & we know he is a very thorough Doctor.



End result of today's visit is I am to try Light Therapy.
This in itself sounds ok. The idea is, rays of UV light, & UB -I think- light will be directed on my body 3 times a week. Times for the exposure will vary, increasing as I progress, from what I can gather.


After declaring I am not claustrophobic, I was taken to a cubicle to disrobe! Completely! Imagine if you will, the horror of such a thought.

Then, it turns out I have to walk stark naked, from this cubicle with just a mere curtain for privacy, over to a contraption box, Octagonal in shape. Rather like a circular phone box- or the Tardis, for those who like Dr Who.


There are lotions, & potions to be applied to certain -ahem- extremities. N!pples is one location. Not being a male, the other location did not apply to me!

Sunglasses are supplied, with disinfectant to wash them before you wear them. There is a curtain arrangement for the face. This has your name applied & lives in a plastic bag, in a cabinet for future use. I noticed there are cotton gloves, presumably for those whose hands dont itch.

I cringed out into the light box/cabinet. I was so traumatised I had forgotten to remove my knickers. They lay on the floor after prompting from the nurse to remove them.


Huge elements turned on & glared rays at me. Quite a warm sensation. Quite short blasts. I was assured the door is able to be opened, should sudden claustrophobia occur.


I thought to myself, it is very lucky that it is not Gom who suffers this ailment. He is extremely claustrophobic, as he discovered when he had to have his head scanned for fractures, after being attacked in the Hotel.
The plan is, I will recieve this treatment 3 times a week for a time. I was told it is not a quick result. I was also told I can actually wear my underwear to walk to the Light Box - if I feel embarrassed?? WTH?? Who wouldnt feel embarrassed knowing all it takes is a twitch of a curtain to expose your *all*? Sometimes I think they become so blase, they don't realise how traumatising it can be, to have to suddenly 'grin & bare it'!!
Not much comfort there, but better than nothing!

I have new tabs to take. Hope they work. "Itch Pills" the Professor called them!

Hope the light works. There is no readily available parking in the vicinity. Stressful to say the least!



Roberta Flack, Trade Winds.