Sunday, March 19


There is a phrase that is attributed to the Irish, 'May you always have enough'. I find this is my measure of my life.
I don't wish to have more than my share. I don't wish to be 'rich' in the monetary sense. I am rich in the sense of friends and family.
I am rich in the fact that I have a comfortable bed. I have food, should I desire it. I have wonderful friends who support me, in spite of knowing me, warts and all!

All I have ever wanted is 'enough'. I don't want more, but there have been times when I have wanted more, so that I could assist my family. I hate to watch relatives suffer. I always want to be able to assist them.

However, there is the thought that they are walking their own path, with the highs and lows, that will enevitably bring,  trials and difficulties .

Being a parent, to a baby you gave birth to, never becomes easier. no matter how old, you, or they, become.
A parent is for life, whether you want it or not.

I can look back on my parents, whose story is very sad. I don't really know how they lived through it all, but I guess it is the same as me, living through my grief and loss of husband, then son.
You don't have any choice, your heart keeps beating, (though you don't know why) and your lungs continue to fill, involuntarily. You are stuck with 'life'. Suffer.  Like an ugly, lifetime sentence, for everything that has been.

I don't really believe in Karma. But, i often wish I did.

So, my parting thought is, I still, just want to have enough.


keryn said...

Meggie, I'm so sorry that you have lost your son, what a terrible thing.No-one expects to outlive a child. We are more prepared to lose husbands, parents, elders, but not our children. You have my deepest sympathy

Meggie said...

Thank you, Kerryn. It is one of those things you never, in a million years think, will happen to you.My heart keeps beating an my lungs keep filling, and I have no idea, how or why.